My way or…

I read something today that made me think. Well actual I read it three times, in three different ways.  I always find that is the way God works with me.  He knows I need to hear things multiple times to belive them, I need have time to think things through, forget about them and then get made to think them through again before they stick.  This was one of them…

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I don’t know about you but sometimes I get so caught up with wanting my children to do things my way that I think ;I forget; that they are as entitled to an opinion and way of doing things as I am.  The battle of meal times, bath times and bed times can feel so wearing.  What happened to the joy? Where does it go? Where does the acceptance and love and gratitude go?  I don’t know but I’m starting to think that the way to getting it back  is putting others above ourselves, it’s not about enforcing our wills over others but living together in relationship and in love.

And I’m not for a minute saying I think children should get their own way all the time, discipline is important, very important. But maybe there is a different way, with less confrontation and head banging and frustration.

At the moment there seems to be an awful lot of whining and not listening in my house… and it’s been frustrating. Frustrating not knowing why it seems to happen on this rotational basis in my house, not knowing how to fix it without causing even more tension and frustration.  Maybe it’s due to the change of roles in the house and not spending as much time with the children as I’d like to.  Maybe it’s them spending more time at school and being more tired.  And then I read this…

It seems like such a simple solution.  A solution I can do. A solution I’d actually enjoy doing.  A solution the kids would enjoy.
Just this afternoon I spent time playing cars and building roads with the kids. I spent time doing homework with Jenna and then time just drawing people and vests and shorts and surf boards and waves…  This was before I read these. You know what; no fights this afternoon.  That mights just be coincidence but I think it’s true.  The more time and effort you put into a relationship the better it will be. The more time we spend with God the more time we want to be like him and be obedient to Him. Why wouldn’t that transfer to obedience in children?

I’m sure this isn’t a new concept, but I think it’s something I need to work on in my life.  I think I need to remember the blessings and precious moments, concentrate on those and forget about all the moaning about the early mornings, washing and toys left lying around (yes that was a little moan – I’m not perfect!!).

I found this quote on DesiringGod about a year ago and it really sums up what I’ve been feeling…

“Live the gospel in the things that no one sees. Sacrifice for your children in places that only they will know about. Put their value ahead of yours. Grow them up in the clean air of gospel living. Your testimony to the gospel in the little details of your life is more valuable to them than you can imagine. If you tell them the gospel, but live to yourself, they will never believe it. Give your life for theirs every day, joyfully. Lay down pettiness. Lay down fussiness. Lay down resentment about the dishes, about the laundry, about how no one knows how hard you work.”

I’m not a hard-core as this lady, but I’d love to be.

Romans 12:2   Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect

Psalm 118:24   This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Create in me a glad heart Lord.

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Patience… please!!!

Today is obviously going to be just one of THOSE DAYS!! Where everything seems to end in argument and the naughty step is permanently occupied by someone!

How can some days be so peaceful with everyone sharing and getting along and then the next it’s like world war 3 has erupted and no negotiation is going to end it! The only way to end it is by putting on the TV which creates its own drama’s! Seriously sometimes I wish I could climb into their little brains to figure out exactly what is going on inside there.

Jenna is the middle of a full on strop!!

It’s on days like today when I have to really remind myself of the reason’s why they actually deserve me to keep my cool and deal with it like an adult and not like the impulsive 5-year-old that is sometimes trying to get out to retaliate and fight back when I get frustrated!!

On that note I found this verse today:

Proverbs 15:18

A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel.

Wow there truly is a verse for every occasion! OK p

So today my prayer is for patience, to focus on the positive and try remember all the lovely little things that my children do and say!