Move on over grandpa

So its peak hour for school traffic and I’m in a rush as usual and the littlest un’ decided to fill her nappy at a most inconvenient time, and then wee as the new nappy was being slotted into position… as you do!

So throw children into the car and off I rush and the traffic on the main road to the school is busy… Now I can see the front of the line of car’s but just can’t see what in heck is holding it up. Oh, a gap in the traffic in the opposite direction and cars start moving over taking what ever is holding them up. And then I see it….

And No this isn’t the actual little old man – I was being very traffic rule conscious and left my phone in my pocket!

Seriously in the middle of a main road, hair blowing in the wind and coat flying out behind him. Really do you have a death wish, I don’t mean to be rude but you don’t have that much longer to go, or maybe you’ll live to a hundred!!

He then turns left off the main road with a smile and wave at all the cars… Ah sweet…. NOT…. that’s the road I need to go down!!! And now he’s driving in the middle of the road on the white dotted line because the road is full of speed humps!!! SIGH!!!! I really am going to be late today!!!!

So eventually we part ways… with a cheery little wave from wrinkles and a gritted teeth wave from a grumpier me ( yes I started off grumpy! Who knew school photo’s could be so darn expensive…. I mean come on I could feed my family for a week on the amount I need to spend!)!

So how do I apologise for being late…. It wasn’t my fault it was the mobility scooters…I got a handful of pee and had to wash down the kitchen table (I know I know the table is not a changing station… but I was in a hurry and thought it was quicker, and my trousers feeling too tight on the bulge and I didn’t want to get on the floor, and I didn’t want the other 2 dressed children to follow me upstairs and start playing and and and… Yes I know excuses all of them… the table is not a changing station!!).

Oh well at least the morning’s been interesting… let’s hope it doesn’t continue that way!

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Inconvenient blooming bowels!!!!

So why is that every time you are in a hurry to get out the door a crappy nappy needs changing. Or every time you have just got everyone dressed and changed their wet nappies they decided to do a poo!

And why has my littlest little girl decided that 3-4am in the morning is a great time to work on a turd!! I mean come on!!

They have to take after their father and his inconvenient bowels – whenever you need help (maybe it’s just an excuse to get out of it??) or trying to shove him out the door to get somewhere on time the inconvenient bowel strikes!! In his words “when you gotta go you gotta go”!! Apologies in advance to my husband for talking about his BM’s on my blog!!

Yesterday for example; there were 9 poo nappies (between 2 children) and 2 sticky butt’s to wipe! Talk about a crappy day!

Wouldn’t the world (meaning MY world) be a nicer place if they could all coordinate their bowel movements to specific times of the day, all together! I know I still have at least 2 years to go but I’m dreaming of nappy free days! And having nightmares of the process to get to that stage via potty training!

Here’s hoping for a less crappy day today!! How crappy are your days?